Elder Colin White—June 13, 2016, from Edenton, NC

 

Well, this week was crazy. It seemed as if nothing happened----and then all of a sudden everything would happen all at once.

 

 This week we helped a very less-active member do yardwork. He is an old Vietnam Vet. He was in the Marines way back in the day and had some of the most funny stories I've heard in a long time. One of those stories was about the time he was in Boot Camp at Paris Island, NC and they had all just been issued rifles. He was bragging to all the guys about how he could disassemble the rifle blind-folded, and no one believed him, so naturally he had to show them! He grabbed his buddy's rifle and right there on the bunk took it all apart. Just as he finished taking his friend's rifle all to pieces, their drill sergeant walked in the barracks, and ordered all the recruits to grab their rifles and march out to the parade grounds. So they are all lined up outside and he hears the drill sergeant yell, "PRIVATE LEE--WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE!?!!! GET OVER HERE NOW!!!"  At this point he realized he was in trouble, so he quick ran over there--- There is the sergeant standing next to his buddy whose rifle he took apart, and his friend is standing there, at attention--with his rifle completely disassembled. He was holding all of the pieces in a pillow case over his shoulder! After much being yelled at-- he reassembled his friend's rifle and then the both of them had to run laps around the platoon until they threw up.

 

On Wednesday we were in the library updating online referrals and overheard this real old black guy talking to his friend who said, "Well, you know air-conditioning give you arthritis!" As missionaries we hear people say the funniest things. The other day we were way out in the country in Tyner, which is more- or-less in the middle of nowhere and we ended up on a sand road in the middle of the woods. . .  Elder Pitts says to me, "We're lost," and I told him, "I know. We are more lost than one of the Lost Ten Tribes of Israel!" (and if you know anything about the Bible, that's pretty lost). I mean really though, they are still lost! In the process of getting un-lost, we passed what we are about 65% sure was a Klu Klux Klan meeting --or it could've been a honkytonk, or both, for that matter. 

 

Another time we were walking down Oakum Street and these random people called us over to talk, and so we taught them the Restoration, but they were high... and right as Elder Pitts was inviting them to be baptized, the one of them stands up and just starts screaming at the top of his lungs (I guess a friend drove by in a car...). It was pretty much the worse lesson and commitment ever extended by a missionary in this state, but at least it was funny.

 

At church on Sunday the sister sitting next to us in Sunday school was about to explode because they started discussing politics. She was keeping her cool pretty well until the teacher started talking about Amilici at the beginning of the book of Alma. . . he said, "Man, Amilici just went all ‘Hilary Clinton’ all over the place!" and she just let loose--not because of her political views, but she just couldn't stand them wasting church time talking about politicians. People here are just so funny about things. Whether it be food, or government, it seems people here either absolutely love something and think it's the best--or they can't stand it because it's so terrible. It all depends on who you ask around this town.

 

Hope y'all have a blessed week until next time!

-- -Elder White